[Disclaimer: I’m not a professional by any means- this is just my opinion based on what I’ve been through and what’s worked for me.]
[Trigger Warning: Suicide and other sensitive material]
September is also known as National Suicide Prevention Awareness month, and before the month ends, I want to shed some light on how critical it is to spread awareness and educate ourselves on the severity and detriment mental health can cause. Let’s start with some stats:
-Every 40 seconds, someone in the world takes their life according to W.H.O., and to put that in perspective that’s about 800,000 people per year.
-Men are 4X more likely to take their own life than women.
-Suicide is the 2nd leading cause of death between the ages of 10 and 34. (YES, as young as 10 years old, just let that sink in…)
“In 2018, over 10 million American adults seriously thought about suicide, more than 3 million made a plan, and 1.4 million attempted suicide” -Sandee LaMotte, CNN
Now imagine these numbers during a global pandemic. With the increase of self-isolation, depression rates are more than likely sky-rocketing, along with an increase of anxiety disorders. It’s crucial that people are informed and recognize the signs because this could lead to saving a life!
If you’ve been struggling with your mental health lately…
I always reiterate this but firstly I want to say: you are NOT alone. If you need someone to talk to, and your friends and family aren’t available- there are hotlines out there for you. 1-800-273-8255 is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. If you’re in the U.S. or Canada you can text 741741, the Crisis Text Line. I’m also always here if you want to reach out! DM me on Instagram @sofstateofmind if you need to vent or would like advice (even though again, I’m not any type of professional or expert).
It’s okay to not be okay. Life is hard, and during a pandemic, your emotions are amplified along with your mental health issues. Someone out there needs you. Someone out there loves you. You have so much life left to live. It’s not going to be dark forever, remember the sun always rises the next day.
I want you to also carefully consider your journey with yourself (if your issues have more to do with your self than external circumstances). The first and most important relationship we have is the one with ourselves. The way we talk to ourselves, view ourselves, and respect ourselves sets the tone and standard for every relationship we have in our life. Would you talk to someone else the way you talk to yourself? Most people I know don’t even know how to take a compliment (including myself). We either deny the compliment, get uncomfortable or minimize it. Why do we not allow ourselves to fully accept and BELIEVE good things about ourselves? We’re quick to be hard on ourselves. Using our internal voice to express how dumb we are because we didn’t do one small thing. Looking at ourselves in the mirror and feeling so ugly just with a zit or minor bloating. When someone says something negative to us, we internalize it even more. Take it to heart. If we don’t set those boundaries with ourselves, how are we ever going to prevent others from crossing them? How are we ever to advocate for ourselves?
Dealing with similar issues myself, I feel like it’s safe to say this is something I’m constantly going to have to work on until I get to a place where I have more of a control on things. As I’ve been on a journey to practice gratitude and self love, however, I’ve tried to make some changes within myself. Maybe they’ll work for you too. When I find myself complaining, I try to name something I’m grateful for immediately after. When I say something negative about myself, I try to point out something positive or discover a way to adjust what I don’t like. Instead of passing judgment on others, I’ve been trying to think more about what they might be feeling and putting myself in their shoes. I’ve been holding myself more accountable in my relationships, and recognizing where I can improve personally. Working on my perception of the world and the perception I have of myself has been improving the way I deal with self-deprecation and in turn minimizing depressive episodes.
Recognizing suicidal signs in the people we love (here are just a few...)
-Isolation
-Hearing them say things like “I feel like a burden to everyone” or “I don’t have a reason to live”
-Mood swings
-Reckless behavior
-Extreme shifts in sleeping patterns
-Increased usage of Drugs/Alcohol
If you see someone you love hurting, there a number of ways you can help:
Stay informed: Again, recognize the signs. Understand the symptoms.
Listen empathetically: Most of the time, people just need a NON-JUDGEMENTAL ear to listen to. Whenever we’re overloaded and/or overwhelmed the most comforting feeling is someone simply acknowledging what we’re going through- reassurance that what we’re feeling is valid.
Be patient: mental health isn’t well understood, and even more so for the person who’s dealing with it. There will be good and bad days, growth isn’t linear. Empathize with that.
Don’t assume: Seriously. Don’t assume you know what they’re going through or know how they’re feeling. Don’t compare their situation to others. If you’re offering someone mental health advice, focus solely on their needs. Encourage them to seek help: Whether that be a therapist or the number of hotlines! Support is everywhere, and meeting with professionals can't make it any worse.
Check in on them: Don’t stop showing up for them. See how they’re doing from time to time. Your support could mean the world to them.
*All of these things, must be done within reason. Don’t over extend yourself, and don’t take on more than what you can handle when supporting someone.
Remember, your life has value. You’re needed. Don’t let this be the end. Your story isn’t over.
Photo Credit: @_meaningfulminds on Instagram
love, Sof
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