I’ve always thought about this concept. If I met my younger self, what would I say? Or even, if I met my future self, would I be proud of her? I decided to go ahead and write this letter, because I play the role of “older sister” to a lot of little munchkins (you know who you are). I hope that they, if no one else, can get something out of this. So here goes…
Dear [younger] Me,
Your potential is uncanny. So why do you care so much about what everyone thinks? Is it not your life? The only opinion that matters is your own. It’s your life to live, not theirs. It sounds cliché, but do what makes your heart happy. Major in what you want to major in. Wear what you’re comfortable in. Be friends with people you actually like!!! Stop caring what someone is going to say if you decide to go to one college over the other. It’s your path to take, and eventually you’ll end up where you’re meant to be. It’s God’s plan, not theirs.
Stop forcing friendships. It may be necessary in the moment because without these friendships you feel alone. Trust me, it’s not worth it. Stop making excuses for them. Don’t chase. If they want to be in your life, they will make a conscious effort to do so. You don’t need to settle for anything less. You’ll find your people. You’ll make healthy, meaningful friendships!!! They’ll fulfill you in a sense. So stop stressing. Whoever’s meant to be in your life, will be there, naturally.
Someone else’s opinion of you doesn’t define your worth. There will be people who won’t like you. You can’t do anything to change their opinion, so don’t try to. You can’t be everyone’s cup of tea, and that’s okay. Some people just don’t like tea, they prefer coffee instead.
You’re allowed to stand up for yourself. You’re allowed to have it your way sometimes. You’re allowed to be selfish. Don’t let people scare you into not having a voice. You have one, you deserve one and you were meant to use it. It’ll make all the difference one day.
Allow people to be there for you. I know it’s hard to believe, but some people really just want the best for you. It’s going to be hard to distinguish who has the right intentions, but when you know deep in your heart this person is good- let them be good to you. You’re not alone, and you will go through some really tough times. That’s when you’ll need them the most, so just let them support you. You don’t have to go through anything by yourself and you won’t always be able to handle it. Some things are bigger than you.
Try not to get close to people so quickly. Give it some time. Let them prove to you they’re genuine with the right intentions.
I know it’ll be hard, but stress less. It’s not worth stressing over until there’s actually something to stress over. Thinking of the worst-case scenario every time is exhausting. You’re just wasting your energy. Go with the flow and let things be.
Keep caring the way you do. People may say you’re too sensitive, but this is also what makes you empathetic. Be proud of these characteristics. Care about people the way you want to. Don’t expect anything in return, because of course you’ll always be disappointed. Do it selflessly. But never change the person you are, it’s what defines you!!!
It’ll look like people have it better than you. You will feel like you deserve more. You’ll wonder why your life is so unfair, and you’ll keep comparing yourself to others. I promise, you’ll get your moment. No one has a perfect life, even though it may seem like they do. Don’t be ungrateful. You’re blessed way more than you think, and everyone is going through something you don’t know about. Never make the mistake of assuming.
You’re going to get through it. You may not feel like you will, and at times it’ll feel like the end of the world with no light at the end of the tunnel. It’ll pass, it always does. God doesn’t give you anything you can’t handle. Everything you go through will make you stronger, and there’s no end to how strong you’ll become and will keep becoming. I believe in you. And I’m proud of who you’ll soon become.
Take it one day at a time. Remember to breathe. Good things take time, be patient. I’ll end this on a quote to all the little girls out there,
“Don’t let what he wants eclipse what you need. He’s very dreamy, but he is not the sun. You are.” –Christina Yang, Grey’s Anatomy
-love Sof
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